I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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