i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
