I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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