THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
