This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
