Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
