i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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