I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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