How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
