We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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