is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
