I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
