Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
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