grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
