I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Randomize
