Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
