I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
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