It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Randomize
