Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
