I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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