Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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