did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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