I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize