I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
