so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
