she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize
