If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
