when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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