Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Randomize
