oh god the rape fog is back!
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
