He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize