So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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