THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
