My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
try to milk me bitch
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
