It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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