brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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