He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
being pregnant is like rehab
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
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