I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
