I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
