do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize