I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize
