Fine. I'll sleep in my office
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
a search helicopter?!
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
