Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize