Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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