Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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