Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize