i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
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