"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
