Already got asked if we're dating
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize