First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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